Every week there’s a bunch of music-related stories, links, videos and other internet goodies that are a little on the trashy side, but for whatever reason get everyone in the office talking.
This is what the Tone Deaf Trash Can is all about: it’s our avenue for sharing the funniest, weirdest and downright tackiest music stories of the week to help you keep up to date with the best (and worst) things happening in pop culture. Don’t feel guilty – you’re allowed to enjoy it.
The Black Keys’ Drummer Calls Justin Bieber A “Fucking Irresponsible Asshole”
One of the most unexpected feuds in music has to be between Grammy-winning rock duo The Black Keys and losing-at-everything pop star Justin Bieber, and this week it escalated even further with drummer Patrick Carney calling the 20-year-old “a fucking moron”, amongst other things, in a new interview with Rolling Stone.
Carney speaks about the time last year when Bieber tweeted, “the black keys drummer should be slapped around”, after Carney made what he claims was a complimented lost in translation; saying that Grammy’s are the last of Bieber’s worries considering the number of zeroes in his bank balance.
“[He] sicced 40 million Twitter followers on me because I paid him a compliment he didn’t understand. I’m saying that he should be grateful that he has a fucking career in music,” Carney explains. “And he shouldn’t be fucking telling his followers to slap me, and then also be doing anti-bullying bullshit. It’s so irresponsible.
And getting to the juicy bit, he continues, “Justin Bieber is a fucking moron. And that’s the gist of what I was saying. And then he goes and says I should be slapped? Honestly, I feel bad for him. Every single person who works with him should fucking be embarrassed that they don’t … No one is doing him any favors, you know? And honestly, I don’t dislike his music. I don’t listen to his music, but he needs to not conduct himself that way. Like, really, you make millions of dollars playing music, you should feel fucking lucky.”
Yeah, this one’s pretty easy. #TeamPatrick #CarneyArmy
Kylie Minogue Getting Rejected Is Your New Favourite .GIF
The best thing to come out of this year’s instalment of that singing show you see a lot of ads for, The Voice, isn’t anything to do with the talent or lack of Deltra Goodrem, but instead, a glorious .GIF forever immortalising the exact moment Kylie Minogue’s soul shattered into a million tiny, awkward pieces after she was hug-snubbed by contestant Zachariaha Fielding.
And then, defying the impossible, Fielding somehow managed to make the situation even awkward when his apology after the episode aired threw even more shade in the direction of Australia’s Princess of Pop.
“I look back at the footage and it did really embarrass me, but I was just so excited to see Ricky Martin,” the 22-year-old said, his words being the verbal equivalent of a backhanded slap. “I love Kylie, she’s so beautiful…seeing her in person, she is so small.” HNGGG.
Okay buddy, you can still save this, just say you’re a fan of her music. “I don’t have a lot of that, I don’t know any of her songs, but my cousins love her.” OUCH.
And for the moment that stopped the nation (via Pedestrian):
Solange & Jay Z’s Elevator Brawl Made The Internet Lose Its Shit For Good
At this stage, there’s really no valid excuse for not having seen Solange and Jay Z’s post-Met Ball bust-up featuring Beyoncé ***Flawlessly playing it Switzerland.
While no-one involved is yet to make an official statement on the incident, the internet has been closely stalking every one of Solange, Jay and Bey’s movements to try and see what’s happening inside the family everyone wants to be apart of, and from the outside, things are looking okay. As TMZ reported, yesterday Solange and Jay were spotted shopping together in New York, while Junkee noticed Beyoncé throwing support behind her younger sister by posting four successive happy snaps of the two together on Instagram, because that’s how people do things nowadays.
So, with things between the trio hopefully looking peachy as Solange’s boxing dress, it looks like everyone can indulge in some wonderful meme capitalisation, in particular:
I don’t know #WhatJayZSaidToSolange but Beyoncé was like pic.twitter.com/XzZWTyfTJh
— Ⓜ️Ⓜ️Ⓜ️MiKE G™Ⓜ️Ⓜ️Ⓜ️ (@MikePosts) May 12, 2014
Is This The Worst Band To Ever Exist, Ever?
This one of those rare stories that, as a writer, you really struggle to put into words because it’s that batshit insane. You really can’t make this shit up.
You might recognise Toby Shelton who rose to fame not as a prop in The House of Wax, but as the fully grown adult man who actually forked out $100,000 to look like our old mate Justin Bieber. Well now he’s back – this time with a new band, The Plastics.
The Plastics consist of Shelton and his two fellow surgery-obsessed, candle-lookalike BFFs – Kitty Jay, who spent $25,000 to look like Jennifer Lawrence, and Venus D’Lite, who went under the knife to resemble Madonna. Together they join forces like some kind of cartoon villain league to form a bile-renching band that just might single-handely plunge humanity down to our deepest, darkest depths yet.
Watch their debut single below. Warning: the auto-tune levels are high on this one – as are the levels of guilty pleasure.