Pop culture is best when it’s at its worst – when headlines are so bad they’re good.

The Tone Deaf Trash Can is where we take some time to celebrate the funniest, weirdest and tackiest stories in music.

Don’t feel guilty – you’re allowed to enjoy it.

Madonna And Deadmau5’s Awkward Handshake Was The Best Thing To Happen At The Tidal Launch

This week the illuminati revealed their new streaming service, Tidal. It was all very confusing, but the official launch made it look like a pretty big deal.

For one, it involved a lot of famous people including but not limited to Jay Z, Kanye West, Beyoncé, Daft Punk, Jack White, Nicki Minaj, and Rihanna.

There were big words being thrown around like “revolutionise”, and Alicia Keys even said it was “the beginning of a whole new era”. (She probably got in trouble backstage for being a little too forward with the New World Order propaganda. They told you to keep it cool, Alicia.)

The whole event stunk of money, and there has clearly been a lot of work and resources put into this Tidal thing.

Still, that said, all I can really find myself caring about from this shebang is this .GIF of Madonna and Deadmau5 fucking up a handshake like a true pair of lizards:

“Act like a person, do the handshak–fuck–???ahhhh??–HUG!”

So Michael Jackson Used To Prank Call Russell Crowe

Do you remember those slumber parties in Grade 4 when you used to prank call your nemesis Becky Smith and erupt in fits of giggles after asking them if their fridge was running?

What if I told you that Michael Jackson was doing this as a fully grown man? And to fucking Russell Crowe, of all people?

In a recent interview with The Guardian, Crowe spoke about some of the stranger things that have happened to him since becoming famous. Besides al-Qaida threatening to kidnap him, another odd occurrence he mentioned was getting repeated nuisance calls from the King of Pop.

“For two or three fucking years,” he says. “I never met him, never shook his hand, but he found out the name I stayed in hotels under, so it didn’t matter where I was, he’d ring up do this kind of thing, like you did when you were 10, you know. ‘Is Mr Wall there? Is Mrs Wall there? Are there any Walls there? Then what’s holding the roof up? Ha ha.’ You’re supposed to grow out of doing that, right?”

Amazing. So there’s that, Russell Crowe endured three years of this:

Ashton Kutcher Punk’d Some JB Hi-Fi Customers In Sydney

It’s been a while since we’ve seen Ashton Kutcher do what he does best: playing the role of Hilary Duff’s older brother in the iconic 2003 family comedy Cheaper By The Dozen. And punking people. That too.

In a not-so-subtle promotion video for Lenevo, a tablet brand you’ve never heard of until now, Kutcher channels his old Punk’d days as he plays the role of a shaggy-haired JB Hi-Fi sales assistant named Coodrey at one of their stores in Sydney.

Our accents are notoriously hard to pull off, and Kutcher’s valiant attempt goes in and out of sounding South African, Kiwi, and British. Whatever it is, it’s not very True Blue. Bless.

Watch all the dick jokes unfold below.

Ugh, Hannibal Buress’ Jokes Got Cut From Justin Bieber’s Propaganda Roast

Two weeks ago when the internet found out some of the jokes that went down at Justin Bieber’s Comedy Central roast, it was Hannibal Buress’ bit that had people getting hyped.

While all the other comedians cracked sick burns, ultimately playing into Bieber’s grand PR plan to salvage his reputation by looking like a cool dude who can make fun of himself, Buress wasn’t having any of it.

Instead, Broad City‘s resident dentist used his stage time to blow the cover on what the roast was really all about, saying: “I’m just here because it’s a real good opportunity for me… You should thank me for participating in this extremely transparent attempt to be more likable in the public eye.”

Well, the episode finally aired this week, and it didn’t make the final edit.

Boooo. Nothing to see here, folks.

Look At This Dog Playing Drums To Seven Nation Army. Just Look At It.

Drop what you’re doing: it’s a dog playing the drums.

This, friends, is worthy of note because I’m not sure if you know this but doggies don’t usually play musical instruments. They usually sleep, drink water from their bowl, and maybe sometimes play frisbee in the park. But I’ll repeat: playing the drums is not usually part of a dog’s repertoire.

Which is why this Vine of chill lab named Maple playing along to ‘Seven Nation Army’ is something special. Behold:

I’ve realised that four-ish seconds of a smiling labrador hitting a drum pedal in time to a song has got me way too excited and I think I need to go outside for some air. I’m done.

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