Demi Lovato has reflected on having feelings of “survivors guilt”, following the recent reported drug overdose by DMX, as reported by Billboard.
During the interview with TMZ Live, Lovato shares some of the struggles she’s had while reflecting on her history of drug usage.
She said, “Anytime that I see somebody OD or even pass away that’s in the public eye, I immediately think, ‘That could’ve been you had you not been putting all this work in the last couple of years of your life,’ there’s times where I’ve even talked about feeling survivor’s guilt because you do ask yourself, ‘Why am I still here, and why are others not?'”
Lovato continued, “It’s a challenging thing to get over, but ultimately I had to realise that every day is a day that someone else doesn’t get. Every day that I’m here on this earth is a day that I need to be counting my blessings for and just being appreciative and grateful for. It makes me want to live the best life I can possibly live knowing that others didn’t get the same chance that I did.”
The singer also recently released a two-part YouTube Originals docu-series called Dancing With the Devil, which focuses on her overdose in 2018. She also re-created the hospital scene in the music video for her single ‘Anyone’.
In the Dancing With the Devil series Lovato said, “I still deal with the effects of that today. I don’t drive a car because there are blind spots in my vision. I also for a long time had a really hard time reading.”
“I feel like they kind of are still there to remind me of what could happen if I ever get into a dark place again.”
She continued, “I’m grateful for those reminders, but also I’m so grateful that I was someone who didn’t have to do a lot of rehabbing. The rehabbing came on the emotional side and the therapeutic side, internally. I did a lot of work after that – just not physically.”