The Doobie Brothers aren’t too happy with Bill Murray and have expressed their disappointment via the best cease and desist letter you’ll ever read.

In case you haven’t heard, Hollywood legend and walking urban myth Bill Murray has his own line of golf clothing called the William Murray Golf Collection.

Now this isn’t too surprising for someone like Murray given his penchant for doing whatever the hell he wants and the fact that he was a deranged golf course groundskeeper in Caddyshack.

What is surprising is that he used a Doobie Brothers song in commercials for his golf collection without the group’s permission (as per The New York Times).

Needless to say that the Doobie Brothers weren’t too pleased about this and decided to get their lawyer to send a strongly-worded cease and desist letter to the actor.

But it seems like the lawyer had a different definition of “strongly-worded” than most as the letter they sent was nothing short of a hilarious masterpiece of sarcasm and piss-taking.

Words can’t do the letter justice so here it is in its full glory:

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“We’re writing on behalf of our clients, the Doobie Brothers. The Doobie Brothers perform and recorded the song ‘Listen To The Music’, which Tom Johnson of the Doobie Brothers wrote. It’s a fine song.

“I know you agree because you keep using it in ads for your Zero Hucks Given golf shirts. However, given that you haven’t paid to use it, maybe you should change the company name to “Zero Bucks Given.”

“This is the part where I’m supposed to cite the United States Copywrite Act, excoriate you for not complying with some subparagraph that I’m too lazy to look up and threaten you with eternal damnation for doing so.

“But you already earned that with those Garfield movies. And you already know you can’t use music in ads without paying for it.

“We’d almost be OK with it if the shirts weren’t so damn ugly. But it is what it is. So in the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, “Au revoir Golfer. Et payez!””

Take a bow, lawyer for the Doobie Brothers, take a bow.

Check out the letter the Doobie Brothers sent to Bill Murray:

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