A Christmas miracle for internet LOLs occurred after a Catholic Christmas music festival in Sri Lanka accidentally printed the lyrics to Tupac’s gun-toting anthem ‘Hail Mary’ in their programs, instead of the words to the traditional prayer.
The Catholic Joy To The World Festival is a fundraiser for Poverty Alleviation Projects ran by the Archdiocese of Colombo, and bills itself as “a festival of music for peace and harmony”, so it must have come as a shock to festival-goers when they opened the program and read a “prayer” which includes the lines “I ain’t a killer but don’t push me. Revenge is like the sweetest joy, next to getting pussy.”
Now, it feels particularly mean-spirited to tease such charitable, whole-hearted organisers the day after Xmas, but there is so much to enjoy here. The solemn pink borders and Christmas-themed print matched with these lyrics is a joy, as is the fact that the original prayer is a mere seven lines plus an Amen. Here it is:
Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord is with thee;
blessed art thou amongst women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
Pretty short; you could tuck it into half a page, underneath ‘Silent Night’ or something. Now, look at what they mixed this up with (via this guy’s Twitter).
The lyrics to this song span pages, and contain clues throughout that perhaps this isn’t the correct ‘Hail Mary’ prayer’ – little clues, such as the frequent use of terms such as “[Chorus X2]” and “fuck the world”; or maybe the use of the n-word with a z on the end (a word, and spelling, which is largely absent from the Bible); or the line, “To my homeboys in Quentin Max, doin’ they bid, raise hell to this real shit”.
Listen to the offensive Tupac hymn below, and thanks to the Archdiocese of Colombo for providing these tidings of joy.
