Every week there’s a bunch of music-related stories, links, videos and other internet goodies that are a little on the trashy side, but for whatever reason get everyone in the office talking.
This is what the Tone Deaf Trash Can is all about: it’s our avenue for sharing the funniest, weirdest and downright tackiest music stories of the week to help you keep up to date with the best (and worst) things happening in pop culture. Don’t feel guilty – you’re allowed to enjoy it.
Check Out The Sass Level On This Fierce Vogueing Teen
This week the internet finally got the hero it deserves, Brendan Jordan, the Nevada teenager whose sass will make you want to scream ‘Yasss’.
Brendan gave the world much-needed life when he was spotted during a live news cross standing/slaying in the front row amid a sea of basic pre-teens at the opening of a new local shopping centre.
The entrepreneurial teen saw the cameras and seized the opportunity to capitalise on his #personalbrand and vogue like his life depended on it. And thus, a star was born.
“I just saw a camera, and did my thing,” he told Today.com. “I was imagining myself as if I were Lady Gaga, and that no one could destroy me.”
But don’t worry, Brendan isn’t letting The Fame get to him, and insists, “I’m still the same kid I was before I did the video”. #Humble
Beef Wrap-Up Part 1: Iggy Azalea Vs Snoop Dogg Feat T.I.
Can you smell that? I hope you’re hungry, because a full-blown beef barbecue has been cooking up in the Trash Can this week. The first dish involves girl who raps the bits between Charli XCX’s chorus, Iggy Azalea, Instagram fiend Snoop Dogg, and rapper who might’ve had a song or two on your iPod Mini in 2008, T.I.
Snoop fired the first shots earlier this week when he posted a series of incriminating Iggy Azalea memes on Instagram – you know, like those ones pointing out her very unfortunate, very uncanny resemblance to the main characters of White Chicks.
Iggy caught wind of Snoop’s shade and responded in a series of since-deleted tweets, saying “every time I’ve ever spoken to you you’ve always been nice as hell, I’m disappointed you’d be such an ass for no reason.”
It didn’t earn her any remorse, though, with Lion refusing to stop the flow of low-res Azalea memes (the best one being this).
But it looks like things are finally done after T.I. stepped in to defend his Mullumbimby protégé and demand that she get an apology, with Snoop posting that apology in an Instagram video this morning.
Dropping the beef like it’s hot, he tells the camera: “Boys and girls, I just got off the phone with my homeboy Tip, the King of Atlanta, and it’s officially over. No more bad talk. I apologize. Yeah, I apologize. I’m sorry; I won’t do it again.”
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Beef Wrap-Up Part 2: Ariel Pink Vs Madonna Feat. Grimes
For the second course we’re moving on from the rap game to the #edgy indie scene, involving three people not opposed to changing the colour of their hair from time-to-time, Madonna, Ariel Pink, and Grimes.
In an interview with Faster Louder this week, Pink said he had been tapped in by Interscope to help write tracks for Madge’s forthcoming studio album because “they need something edgy”, and in his subsequent explanation proceeded to take a steaming smug shit on his collaborator’s career.
“They need songwriting. She can’t just have her Avicii, her producers or whatever, come up with a new techno jam for her to gyrate to and pretend that she’s 20 years old. They actually need songs. I’m partly responsible for that return-to-values thing,” he said.
Pink’s comments turned a lot of Madonna fans red, including Grimes who swooped in to defend her idol on Twitter.
Ariel pinks delusional misogyny is emblematic of the kind of bullshit everyone woman in this industry faces daily — Grimes (@Grimezsz) October 14, 2014
The controversial interview eventually made its way around to Madonna’s manager, Guy Oseary, who hurled a figurative egg at Pink’s face with a reaction that can basically be translated to “Who is you?”
.@madonnarebel @madonna and I have never heard of @arielxpink. The label may have reached out but M has no interest in working with mermaids
— Guy Oseary (@guyoseary) October 14, 2014
Pink, now sitting at his computer with bits of yolk dripping from his Big Mouth, confirmed that his ties with the Queen of Pop had officially been cut.
I haven’t heard from Madge in the past 24hrs. Was it something I said? #thankyou #bigmouth #nexttime
— Ariel Pink (@arielxpink) October 13, 2014
Lorde Sings Southpark’s Lorde Song, Confirms She Is Lorde, Ya Ya Ya
This week we learnt that Lorde might not be as unapproachable as her #edgy gothic exterior suggests, and in actual fact, she’s actually someone you could crack a ripper joke with over a couple of tinnies.
South Park‘s most recent episode portrayed Lorde as the alter-ego of Randy Marsh – Stan’s 45-year-old geologist father – who adopted the character after using the female bathroom at work.
While most celebrities get offended by their badly animated South Park cameos, old champ Lorde took it in her stride and called the episode “surprisingly cute” and “downright sweet” for its uplifting pro-transgender messages.
She even literally sung her praises for the show by giving a fleeting rendition of Randy Marsh’s hit song ‘I Am Lorde Ya Ya Ya’ – sung by the real Sia in the original episode – in a TV interview with 3News.
Compare and contrast:
Chris Brown Thinks Ebola Is A Conspiracy Theory
According to Chris Brown, if there’s another organism on planet Earth that’s almost as despised as him, it has to be some kind of conspiracy theory.
Brown did what he does best this week and pissed off a lot of people by this time claiming that the ebola virus – which has now killed 4,500 people in West Africa alone – is “a form of population control.”
I don’t know … But I think this Ebola epidemic is a form of population control. Shit is getting crazy bruh. — Chris Brown (@chrisbrown) October 13, 2014
I say what I want. If u don’t like it…. “SUCK MY ASS” ( little Asian girl voice) — Chris Brown (@chrisbrown) October 14, 2014
Naturally the internet went to town with the remarks.
The average American has a higher chance of being stricken by Chris Brown than by ebola. — Jenny Yang (@jennyyangtv) October 15, 2014
The real conspiracy theory here, though, is how Chris Brown’s career still exists.