We’re the Harlots, a Melbourne six-piece who like to sweat, shout and play rock and roll. We like to dance, and we like it when you dance, too.
What’s your earliest memory of performing and who inspired you to start?
Spinning back a few years, we were awkward kids who were into Queen and vitamin deficiencies; once we grew up, we figured that our best shot at being famous was capering around on stage, rather than having scurvy. So, we drank a lot of cranberry juice, learned to play instruments and – voila! Queen.
You must answer this question honestly or we steal your rider. What and where was the first gig you went to?
Here’s the deal: no matter how incredible our virgin gig happened to be, it’ll never compare to that time when our olds went to see the Rolling Stones at Wilson Hall, during which Mick Jagger gyrated so hard that the entire front row made the snap decision to form the Skyhooks, Daddy Cool and just about every other noteworthy Melbourne band you care to name. Everything was better in 1970, except maybe the internet.
‘Fess up. What records have you stolen from your parent’s record collection and why?
The Big Chill Original Soundtrack – we compulsively steal anything with Jeff Goldblum on the cover. There’s also this obscure group on there called The Temptations; we reckon those guys could really have taken off if only they’d sung a couple of songs about their girls, or whatever. Something mushy, you know?
What’s on heavy rotation on your iPod right now?
We’re a pretty eclectic bunch, so we’re never stuck in one groove for long! One thing is certain, though: Tom is still thrashing The Very Best of Peter Allen, and the rest of us are still surprised that his cassette player can take the punishment.
How do you find new music?
We listen to the radio; Melbourne is blessed with an embarrassment of independent radio riches. Tune yourself into PBS or RRR and you’re bound to find something to sink your teeth into.
Do you have any particular ritual before you go on stage, or even a lucky charm you take with you?
We pace around, write (and forget) set lists, stare into the middle distance, regret life decisions, vomit into our helmets – the sorts of things that make for real good Saving Private Ryan pantomime. Pantomime is in, yeah?
If you could curate your own festival, where would it be, who would be on the bill, how many people would you let in and what features would it have?
We think it would be cool if Melbourne had its own turn as a music festival city, like Austin is to SXSW. Melbourne is already full of venues and punters with distinct agendas and tastes – all you’d need to do is help them pick their poison.
When you’re Rolling Stones Big, what are you going to request on your rider: don’t be shy. We want specifics!
We’ve made a nasty habit of setting fire to green rooms, so we request that our rider budget be donated to carbon-offsetting charities. See what we did there?
Because it’s more fun to do things together, which living Australian artist would you most like to collaborate with? Tell us why?
Then the occifer said: The Cruel Sea. They’re real good at music.
What is your band’s music the best soundtrack for?
Other bands can say cool stuff like ‘robbing banks’ or ‘crashing a pool party’, but we’re more one of those ‘recalling that time you broke into a funeral parlour to steal the body of your recently deceased fianceé in order to give them a proper pagan burial but forgot to bring enough briquettes to get the pyre going before the police showed up’ sorts of groups.
Where we can see you play next, what releases do you have available and where can we get them?
We’re launching our new single ‘Got No Soul’ at the Old Bar on the 13th of July, with support from the irrepressible Mesa Cosa and the sinister Strangers From Now On. Come along and buy yourself a one-off CD pressing of the single, or else you’ll be able to get yourself a digital copy from our Bandcamp after the date.
