There’s a certain showmanship that can’t be taught, can’t really be copied, and sure as shit can’t be faked. Most people would throw their own body on the line to save a family member (maybe even a good friend or a pet), but there are certain legends/dickheads – depending on how you view them – who will do it purely for the thrill of it.
Link Meanie, frontman for The Meanies, showed this in spades at the Port Royal Street Party during set closer (and Bored cover) ‘Feed the Dog’. Climbing the scaffolding of the stage, Meanie threw himself around the roof like a ragdoll while slamming his body on it like he wanted to fall through. It was absolute madness and light years ahead of any antics pulled by the younger bands they played ahead of.
This was just one highlight from the inaugural event that will surely prove to be a mainstay on the gig calendar. It’s hard to fault the organisers on any aspect of the day, with everything running as smooth as silk. Bands ran on time and the sound was remarkably clear from the single stage positioned at the back of the street.
Warm chips and soggy hotdogs were given the flick, with Huxtaburger, Uncle Vietnamese, and Salford Lads Club providing quality eats for punters to line their stomachs before hitting the bars. Fennell Street locals Matilda Bay Brewing Company and the ubiquitous Sailor Jerry kept spirits high with some very reasonable festival prices.
One oddity that was almost as entertaining to watch as the bands was the backyard carousel. Made out of a hills hoist and a few bikes, with a sound system powered by the carousel itself, it was probably the most Australian merry-go-round you’ll ever see.
The party took a while to fill up as people slowly flowed into Fennell Street throughout the day. At a guess, they were probably enjoying their first decent sleep since the Melbourne stinkwave finally broke the night before – a factor that was pretty lucky for the organisers, as the lack of shade would have led to some nicely fried punters.
It was easy to tell through the mass of band shirts and general chit chat that the majority of the crowd were there for Cosmic Psychos, but there were plenty of bands to get through before the three-piece would destroy the stage.
For those who got in early, there would have been very little disappointment in band choices, with a line-up containing some of Melbourne’s more hyped-up bands.
Bits Of Shit took the stage at 1pm, with frontman Danny Vanderpol stalking the crowd barefoot and generally giving the festivities a good kick in the nads to get it going.
A band that should have been on every ‘acts to look out for in 2014’ list are Batpiss, who continued the assault with a killer set. Their music lives somewhere on the fringes of hardcore and is the sort that breeds in dingy bars with no stages.
After a quick Huxtaburger run (best burger in Melbourne, hands down), Drunk Mums filled the street with their vacant, dodgy chords. Gaining Cherry Bar owner James Young as a manager last year, Drunk Mums played garage punk and sang about nangs and saggy tits, and yes – it was as good as it sounds.
Although, there was some confusion during the set when two of the band members couldn’t remember if they’d already played the song they just started.
Harmony are such a complicated band to pinpoint. They seemed like a bit of a wildcard in a line-up that consisted mostly of straight punk and hard rock. While they contain elements of those genres, their experimental inclinations made them stick out like elephants in an aquarium.
Nation Blue singer/guitarist Tom Lyngcoln fronts the band, which features three back-up singers reminiscent of the old RnB acts of the 50s. Interestingly, there seemed to be somewhat of a battle between the vocal trio and the rest of the band. While they might not have been the best choice for a street party, it was still good to see musicians testing the boundaries of rock music.
The crowd were nice and lubricated by the time The Meanies took the stage as the first shades of night started to appear. Old and young moshed alongside one another as the band hyped up the crowd into frenzies of circle pits.
Meanie flung himself around the stage like a deranged interpretive dancer and closed the set with his aforementioned rooftop stunt. As if it was a normal occurrence, no other member of the band seemed remotely phased that their frontman was only a few centimetres away from serious pain.
Darkness had fallen and the crowd at the front of the stage had swollen as Ross Knight, Dean Muller, and John McKeering took their places. Looking like they’d just stepped out of the country pub, and with all the charm of a rusty chainsaw, Cosmic Psychos set off the explosives that The Meanies had planted in the crowd.
Playing through classics like ‘Rip ‘N’ Dig’ and ‘Dead In A Ditch’, a good and big mosh pit opened up while security guards tried to stop the crowd-surfers and stage jumpers. At one point, Knight informed the raucous audience that the organisers would stop the show if people didn’t stop stage jumping.
People weren’t really in the mood for rules at during the Cosmic Psychos set, so it wasn’t a surprise that the ban was only followed for all of three minutes.
After performing ‘David Lee Roth’ as an encore, the band took their bows and then turned around to brown-eye the crowd. The tightest, hardest, and fastest band of the day, it’s also a testament to their reputation that they were the oldest band at Port Royal.
If there was one lesson learnt on Saturday, it was that all the talk of rock being a bastion of youth is a load of shit when there’s bands like The Meanies and Cosmic Psychos still killing it.
