The cheeky masters of punk rock party times The Bennies are about to slay everyone’s favourite weekend in June- The Queen’s Birthday long weekend. Re-titling the public holiday to ‘Bong Weekend’ The guys will zoom down the east coast playing four headline shows, supported by Sydney’s psychedelic comrades Fait Accompli.

The Bennies have had an impressive 2014 so far, starting off with the ‘Knights Forever’ tour, which was their biggest wildest, loudest and most successful tour to date. Add to that their first ever tour of NZ and coveted slot of the biggest festival in the nation Soundwave and another overseas tour these guys aren’t slowing down.

Having just finished off their second tour of China in 12 months playing at music festivals and shopping malls, we thought it was only fitting for them to educate us on how to tour China effectively, so here we go, The Bennies’ 8 Step Guide To Conquering China.

Step 1 – Get Your Gestures Right

“The first thing that is crucial to learn is that all/most physical gestures are culturally very different to Australia. So when you hail a cab and he stops and gives you a smile and a thumbs up… that more than likely means that he doesn’t want you in his cab! Haha. Actually, a smile is universal – piff them everywhere and you will be greeted with the same!”

Step 2 – Learn How To ‘Ni Hao’

“I dunno how to spell it… but ‘ni-how’ [ni hao] is hello. We invented a game called ‘ultimate ni-how’… Whoever throws out the most extreme/ultimate ‘hello/ni-how’ wins. We would yell it out of cabs/trains/hotels/jumping through things/on stage. These were funny as for us… and pretty much always got a lot of laughs from the locals. I dunno if they were laughing at our terrible pronunciation or our enthusiasm… but it would often result in a free beer.”

Step 3 – Appreciate Warm Beer

“A few words explaining this step: Cold beers seem to be pretty much impossible to find – so give up straight away and embrace a warm ale for your parched throat. Beer is pronounced ‘pidge-o’[pinyin]”

Step 4 – Be Good To Each Other

“Despite what us Australians believe… or have been led to believe… China is far less of a nanny state than Australia. As long as you are good to other people ‘ya can pretty much do whatever you want. When was the last time you went go-karting drunk!?”

Step 5 – Get Used To Seeing Your Dinner Alive

“You’ll see live animals in cages in some of the restaurants. They will be used for food. This is fairly confronting. For those that eat meat.. it is pretty hypocritical to not be down with this (all those cooking shows on t.v say that it is important to know what you are eating). With that said, I eat meat and this freaked me out hard.”

Step 6 – Don’t Drink Baijiu

“Don’t drink baijiu unless you wanna cause havoc on yaself. Bad hangovers, bad decisions and a guarantee vom-dog.”

Step 7 – Get Weird

“The weirdest gigs are the most wonderful.”

Step 8 – Visit The Small Towns

“In these towns people are so happy/confused to see you. Also, you have heaps more chance of getting fireworks there than the big cities.​”

The Bennies’ ‘Queen’s Birthday Bong Weekend Tour’

With guests Fait Accompli
Thursday June 5 – Karova Lounge, Ballarat VIC
Friday June 6 – Ding Dong Lounge, Melbourne VIC
Saturday June 7 – Captain Cook Hotel, Sydney NSW
Sunday June 8 – Crowbar, Brisbane QLD

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