Most musicians have a record label horror story and Lana Del Rey has emotionally recalled her own in an awards speech. 

The pop star received Variety‘s Decade Award on Saturday, December 4th, at a brunch in Los Angeles. She used her acceptance speech to thank many of the people who helped her throughout her career.

“My managers helped me up the stairs. I still haven’t mastered the art of walking in heels. I’m super grateful for them, Ben (Mawson) and Ed (Millett), and for this award. I’m really glad that they’re here with me,” she said.

“They picked me out of the bar scenes, lounge singer scenes that I was singing in for about eight years before I met them. They got me out of a deal I made for 11 records for nine grand while I was working at a restaurant and living in a trailer park.

Lana revealed just how much Ben did for her around this time. “Ben did that in one hour and then the next day he flew me to London and let me live with him,” she recalled. “In a year, I wrote ‘Video Games’, and I was ready to make good records, I was ready to make a lot of records.”

The singer also reflected on the effect criticism has had on her career. “I’m really always grateful for any acknowledgement and also super grateful for all the criticism – I get a lot. What’s good about it is I really believe what’s reflected back to you is in some way a mirror to what’s going on in your inner life.

It’s given me a huge opportunity to look inward and to look at my family of origin and look at my lineage, see what’s going on up there.”

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